by Charles Cotesworth Pinckney
Representative democracy is becoming a big hit with federalists and anti federalists alike. We sat down with a man whose name is Daniel of Saint Thomas Jenifer (he asked us not to print that but we did anyway) to talk about what representative democracy really means.
PINCKNEY: So, Mr. (snicker) Jenifer, I understand that you represented Maryland in the Constitutional Convention?
JENIFER: Indeed I did, good sir. I also helped make representative democracy a reality!
PINCKNEY: For the benefit of our not-as-educated-as-us audience, what exactly is representative democracy?
JENIFER: Well, we're all well aware of what a monarchy is, after that ghastly spell with king you-know-who. We surely didn't want that. And direct democracy is all fine and dandy, but no one has the time to vote on everything, Pinckney! So we decided that representative democracy, which means that the people vote on representatives to vote on the issues for us would be best, so we put in the Constitution. In our government, this will work so that everyone goes to the polls and votes for reps, and they will vote on all the issues in Congress and the like.
PINCKNEY: So… Jenifer? (Cracks up)
JENIFER: (stands up) You should talk, PINKIE! I thought you were a gentleman! (walks off in a huff)
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